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Reading Text 1 Dear Advisor: Should She Propose?

Dear Advisor,

My boyfriend and I just celebrated three years together. I want to ask him to marry me. My friends say I shouldn't. They say that only desperate women propose marriage. Are they right?

Nervous in New Jersey

Dear Nervous,

Your friends are not right. Today it is fine for women to propose to men. Monica did it on Friends. Miranda did it on Sex and the City. In real life, actress Halle Berry did it, too.

In 2003, the Korbel Champagne Company conducted a survey. They asked, "Should women ask men to marry them?" Sixty-seven percent of Americans said yes. The survey asked women, "Would you propose to a man?" Almost 50 percent of the women said they would. They also asked men, "Would you accept?" Almost 80 percent said yes. Thirty-one percent of women know a woman who has proposed to a man. Experts generally agree. Dr. Linda O 'Connor has a radio talk show about love and marriage. O'Connor says that women who propose are usually educated and self-confident. In addition, their boyfriends usually like strong women. However, advice columnist Susan Fine argues that even women with a lot of self-confidence may need some help with their proposals. Here is her advice. First, the proposal should not be a surprise. The relationship should be serious. She also advises women to do two more things. They should write out the proposal and practice it before they ask for their boyfriends' hands in marriage.

How would Susan Fine answer you? If you and your boyfriend are happy, do not pay attention to your friends. And don't invite them to the wedding.

The Advisor

Ex. 1 Read the statements and write true (T) or false (F). Go back to Text 1 and look for the answers you are unsure of. 1. Susan Fine is on the radio.

2. "Nervous in New Jersey" wrote to Susan Fine.

3 . "Nervous in I\lew Jersey" is a man.

4. "Nervous in New Jersey" wants to get married.

5. In 2003 most women said that only men should propose.

6. Dr. Linda O'Connor is a divorce lawyer.

7. The Advisor told "Nervous in New Jersey" to propose to her boyfriend.

Ex. 2 Answer the questions. 1. According to O'Connor, which adjectives describe women who propose to men?

funny educated desperate strong self-confident nervous weak

2. What two suggestions does Susan Fine make?

Text 2 Divorce: a Fifty-Fifty Chance?

Divorce is a growing problem in the United States and many other developed countries. Although thousands and thousands of happy couples get married every year, more than 50 percent of them get divorced. Two researchers at the University of Washington studied marriage and divorce. They learned a lot from their research. With this information, they created a mathematical formula that predicts divorce. Mathematician James Murray and psychologist John Gottman agree that their predictions are correct almost all of the time.

How do they do it?

A husband and wife talk about a difficult subject for 15 minutes. The researchers videotape them. In addition, they record physical information such as heart rate. Then the researchers listen to the conversation. They watch the body language and look at the facial reactions. After that, they give the couple positive and negative points.

For example, the couple might talk about mothers-in-law. If the husband says, "Your mother is a lot of trouble:' the couple gets two negative points. If the wife rolls her eyes, they get two more negative points. However, if the husband says, "Your mother is a lot of trouble, but sometimes she's funny:' then the couple gets one positive point. If he smiles, they get another one.

In the end, the researchers add up the points. A good marriage has five more positive points than negative points. However, the researchers say that a bad score is not necessarily the end of a marriage. Marriages with bad scores can survive. They hope that couples will use the information from the study to learn to communicate. However, not everyone believes that mathematics can stop divorce. A professor of psychology at New York University says that it is "absolutely impossible" to use mathematics to help a marriage. The scientists disagree. They have studied this problem for 16 years. In that time, they have studied more than 700 couples. Their predictions are 94 percent accurate. It seems necessary for the survival of marriage that we listen to them.

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Ex.1 Read the statements and write true (T) or false (F). Go back to Text 2 and look for the answers you are unsure of.

1. Most married couples get divorced.

2. There is a mathematical formula that predicts who should get married.

3. A mathematician worked with a sociologist.

4. For their study, the researchers videotaped couples.

5. The couples took a written test.

6. The researchers gave each couple positive and negative points.

7. If the score is bad, the couple has to get divorced.

8. The formula predicts incorrectly 6 percent of the time.

Ex. 2 Answer the questions.

1. What three things do the researchers look at?

2. Find two examples of body language or facial reactions in the reading.

Ex. 3 Vocabulary Work: Guess Meaning from Context

A. Match the words from Texts 1 and 2 with their meanings.

1. desperate a. ask to marry

2. propose b. sure of oneself

3. self-confident c. hopeless

4. research d. continue to live

5. survive e. study

B. Guess Meaning from Related Words

1. The following words are in the texts. Find other words that are related to them.

Text 1 propose self-confident advice column

Text 2 married mathematical predicts necessary psychology agree

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Text 3 Family Life

Marriage is a thing which only a rare person in his or her life avoids. True bachelors and spinsters make up only a small percent of the population; most single people are "alone but not lonely".

Millions of others get married because of the fun of family life. And it is fan, if one takes it with a sense of humour.

There's a lot of fun in falling in love with someone and chasing the prospective fiancee, which means dating and going out with the candidate. All the relatives (parents, grandparents and great-grand­parents, brothers and sisters, cousins, aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews, stepmothers and stepfathers and all in-laws) meanwhile have the fan of criticizing your choice and giving advice. The trick here is not to listen to them but propose to your bride-to-be and somehow get her to accept your proposal. Then you may arrange the engagement and fix the day of the wedding.

What fun it is to get all those things, whose names start with the word "wedding" — dress, rings, cars, flowers, cakes, etc.! It's great fun to pay for them.

It's fun for the bride and the groom to escape from the guests and go on a honeymoon trip, especially if it is a wedding present from the parents. The guests remain with the fun of gossiping whether you married for love or for money.

It's fan to return back home with the idea that the person you are married to is somewhat different from the one you knew. But there is no time to think about it because you are newly-weds and you expect a baby.

There is no better fan for a husband than taking his wife to a ma­ternity home alone and bringing her back with the twins or triplets.

And this is where the greatest fan starts: washing the new-born's nappies and passing away sleepless nights, earning money to keep the family, taking children to kindergarten and later to school. By all means it's fan to attend parents' meetings and to learn that your children take after you and don't do well at school.

The bigger your children grow, the more they resemble you out­wardly and the less they display likeness with you inwardly. And you start grumbling at them and discussing with your old friends the problem of the "generation gap". What fan!

And when at last you and your grey-haired spouse start thinking that your family life has calmed down, you haven't divorced but pre­served your union, the climax of your fan bursts out! One of your dearest offsprings brings a long-legged blonde to your house and says that he wants to marry. And you think: 'Why do people ever get married?'

Ex. 1 Answer the questions using some information from the text:

1. Consider the following: "Being married or being single". Discuss

the differences between them; the advantages and disadvantages

they have; say what you would do if you were given the choice.

2.Do you agree with the statement "Love makes the world go

round"?

3. What's the difference between loving somebody and being in love

with somebody?

4. At what age do couples usually get married in your country?

5. Is marriage important to you? Why? Why not?

Ex. 2 Find synonyms for the next words in the text:

1. bachelors and spinsters

2. a bride and a groom

3. offsprings

4. a spouse

5. to expect a baby

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Ex. 3. Look back at these two-and three-word verbs from the text.

Write another sentence with each one:

1. to take after

2. to accept a proposal

3. to fall in love

4. to arrange the engagement

5. to do well at

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Text 4 Character and Appearance

Ex. 1 Read and translate the text.

Appearances are deceptive. It is a common truth; practically everyone has met at least someone whose character and appearance differ radically.

When one sees a tall, broad-shouldered youth, one expects him to be strong-willed and brave. One thinks: 'A model to follow!' How often a good-looking individual turns out to be petty, weak-willed or even cowardly. Then one thinks: 'A mediocrity!'

At the same time everyone knows that a lot of great people were of a poor build: short and fragile. It did not stop them from display­ing intelligence and courage. Ingenuity does not depend on one's complexion or constitution.

Plump or fat people create an impression of generous and kind personalities. Strangely enough, not rarely they may be thrifty or even greedy. One usually thinks: 'A scrooge!'

On the other hand, thin or slim nervous ladies often tend to be lavish. They like to buy and never think twice when they pay. One thinks: 'I would call her open-handed and Mother would call her a spendthrift'. Yes, mothers are always stricter in judgements.

Has it ever happened to you that you come to an important of­fice and see an important boss? You immediately evaluate his looks: 'Round-faced, small narrow eyes, dimples on the cheeks and an up­turned nose. What a kind-hearted person! A simpleton!' You tell the boss of your troubles and expect immediate help. But the boss ap­pears to be rude, harsh and wilful. You never get your help and think: 'A stone heart and an iron fist'.

When someone sees a delicately built pretty blonde with curly hair, blue eyes, a straight nose and a high forehead, one is inclined to think that the beauty is intelligent and nice. It may be disappoin­ting to think later 'What a stupid, capricious, impolite bore!'

On the contrary, when one sees a skinny brunette with ugly ir­regular features — a hooked nose, pointed chin, close-set eyes and thin lips, strange thoughts come to one's head; because it is the im­age of evil people — cruel and cunning . It may be a relief some time later to find her a clever, gentle and good-mannered lady and think: 'What charm! A heart of gold!'

Another general misconception lies in the fact that children are always expected to resemble their parents. And parents like it when children take after them. Relatives like to compare moles, the shape of noses, etc. The greatest compliment is: "They are as like as two peas'. The greatest disappointment is to find nothing in common. We want to deny people their exclusiveness, we don't want to admit that nature has selected other options from an enormous genetic fund developed over generations. Why do we like our copies? Who knows!

Ex.2 Answer the questions using some information from the text:

1. Do you agree that people's eyes tell you a lot about their

personality?

2. How do you understand these words: "You must look into people as

well as at them"; "Appearances are deceptive"?

3. What traits of character do you appreciate in your parents, friends?

Give your reasons.

4. Do you think one's appearance is important when you want to get a

job? Why? In what jobs do you think appearance is most essential?

Why?

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